Hajj & Umrah Reviews and Community

It’s been awhile since I sat down and tapped out one of these articles…..

I have been a little bit busy and distracted, running around the Iberian Peninsula.

It was a wonderful, if not slightly surreal, three and a half weeks and, like every occasion when I take off to somewhere new, I learned invaluable life-lessons and aspects about myself that I previously had not realised.

For starters, I have come to sadly accept the fact that I am possibly the worst haggler in the universe (”75 Euros? Ok Mr Wise guy Street Vendor; I’ll take TWO for 150!!!”).  I have also concluded that when travelling in a foreign land, it is wise to perhaps brush up on the basic essentials of the native tongue.  Specifically, the basic “beverage-ordering” vernacular. I think I may have walked away from Spain leaving many a bartender scratching their heads, considering I would quite often stride into a bar and confidently bark “Un Vino Pinto Por Favor!!”

 Invariably, a large glass of red would appear in front of me, so I did start to think that my Espanola was pretty crash hot.  However, after a week or so of this, while dining in a restaurant in Lisbon with friends who were far more fluent, it was tactfully pointed out to me that if I wanted to order a Merlot, it was probably more prudent to say “Un Vino TINTO “.

As it turns out, the word “Pinto” does not mean red, but rather “small penis” in some dialects in Spanish.

This would explain the initial expressions of confusion on the Maître D’s face, followed a by a less than subtle smirk as he would emerge with my drink, quite often in a phallic-shaped vessel. (Note to Ford Company – this just MAY be the reason why your new compact car was not flying out of the lots in Venezuela.)

So, apart from these minor hiccups, the adventure cruised along surprisingly incident-free.  

When you travel through Europe for an extended period of time, you do tend to acquire a little bit of Cathedral-Fatigue. The architecture is stunning, breath-taking, don’t get me wrong. However, after visiting approximately one thousand and eight of them, in a twenty-four hour period, you do find yourself (a little guiltily) longing to see an outdoor dunny, circa Queensland 1955…just for a change of pace.

This brings me to a funny incident in Fatima.

For those of you who know me well, I am not the most devout individual in the neighbourhood. I do suspect that a man named Jesus Christ walked the Earth at some point and he might have even performed some pretty groovy tricks to amaze the masses like feeding them lots of fish and wine (Vino Tinto perhaps?) however, there is nowhere in the Bible that says he could make a double gorgonzola and Roquefort soufflé rise successfully – which is the CONSUMATE miracle in my books.

At any rate, Fatima is a sleepy little town about an hour north of Lisbon in Portugal.  It is world-renowned and welcomes hundreds of thousands of visitors every year. When you drive into the town, it doesn’t strike you as particularly astonishing. The houses are small and whitewashed and the tone of the downtown area is remarkably tame.

As I discovered, Fatima’s claim to fame is that allegedly, back in 1917, three young shepherds were standing around, minding their own business, when the Virgin Mary dropped in to deliver a message of faith and goodwill.

As you can imagine, this turn of events was probably a little bit disconcerting for the shepherds.  Imagine standing in a field up to your knees in sheep dip, when a holy apparition appears from nowhere to say “G’day”. I am sure they would have appreciated some advance notice, so at least they could put the kettle on and pull out the Iced VoVos.

The Virgin Mary then proceeded to keep popping in and out for the next few months (one can only wonder if she ever chose an inappropriate time to stick her head in. “Hey!? Whoa Lady… Give me a minute…I’m just on the can here!”) And as a result, Fatima now boasts one of the most visited and revered Basilicas in the world.

The memorial is quite spectacular, even by this little agnostic’s standards. It stands before a large paved courtyard, in blinding white and gold. A large imposing crucifix, at least 3 stories high, graces the other end of the paved area, and connecting both in a square is a smooth granite walkway.  From a distance, I thought I espied a large group of dwarves walking the perimeter of this concrete field, but ..r inspection, it turned out to be several people, on their knees, inching around the grounds.

The look on my face must have said it all, as one of the guides turned to me and explained “They are showing their reverence to the Virgin Mary. People travel from all over the globe to walk on their knees up and back from the monument for penance and to show respect”. 

I looked again at a young woman who, from the pinched expression on her face, may well have been thinking a holiday in the Bahamas would have been a better idea, and noticed she was wearing heavy knee-pads for the stroll.  The guide nudged me again and indicated to my left. There was a large sign outside a cloakroom “KNEE PAD HIRE 20 EURO”. And here I was thinking she had jumped straight off her skateboard to join in the fun.

Just when I thought it couldn’t get any stranger, I passed the candle offering area - a large trough where you could purchase and burn candles for prayer. Seemed straightforward enough, until I realised that these were not your everyday candles.

None of those long, tubular white varieties here.

Suffering from a broken leg? Here! Taken one of these shin-shaped candles. Bit of indigestion lately? No worries, offer up this small intestine candle and you’ll be right in no time.  I’m sorry to see you have a freakishly large nose. Light up one of these proboscis bad-boys and see what comes out in the wash. You have genital warts? I see….

Sorry, ran out of that brand at the pub last Friday night.

Funnily enough, I also failed to locate a candle to cure cynicism…

I jest, but it is quite an architectural marvel to behold, and if the sheer numbers of people who visit here every year find some comfort, then it is a worthy place.

One more thing must be said here though. ……

Apart from being one of the biggest Basilicas in the world, it ALSO boasts perhaps the biggest holy Gift-Shop I have ever seen.  As part of your Pilgrimage to the Basilica, you are obliged to stop in and have a browse around what can be only described as Opus Dei-Mart.

Forty-five aisles of statues of Mary, Joseph, Jesus…(and Jesus’ lesser know 2nd cousin Gary)… you can buy the pocket sized figurines to the 120 kilogram life-like models…wherever your holy mood takes you.

There were red-light specials on plastic baptismal fonts, and 50% off chocolate crucifixes (for 400 € you TOO can look like Cardinal Maximus IIIVVV in sexy purple velvet robes…sceptres sold separately). Not to be ignored were the rows upon rows of statuettes of the Virgin Mary in Caucasian, Asian and African-American appearance for every ethnic need. On your way out of the check-out there is a priest on-hand for any last minute blessings on your purchases. When he is not there (like the day we visited) there is a Do-It-Yourself-Blessing font of holy water that you can splash around willy-nilly (but preferably not on the paper copies of “Miraculous Visage of Jesus in Margarine”).

I bought a tee-shirt sporting a picture of Lord Jesus in a pair of boardshorts for my baby niece, whom I hope will appreciate the gesture …and the irony when she is a little older.

The most hilarious thing I experienced during this memorable visit was overhearing a husband and wife arguing over the fact that she wanted to send home forty pound clay set of the Nativity. When hubby complained, she snapped back indignantly “You can’t put a price on faith!”

Well…apparently you can….and it is three thousand Euros including VAT.

The Lord Almighty happily accepts VISA, MasterCard and AMEX as well….

It’s all part of the fun of travelling…..

As St Augustine aptly wrote:

The World is a book, and those who do not travel only read one page…

Tune in next time, when I’ll tell you all about a certain Moroccan in Pajamas…who bit my shoulder and called me a Communist!

Kylie Evans
http://www.articlesbase.com/travel-articles/my-auntie-went-to-fatima-and-all-i-got-was-this-lousy-teeshirt-679027.html

Despite what you may hear, the Google AdSense program is not for everyone. There are some types of web sites that do poorly no matter how hard the owners try, and there are others that should be doing well but the webmaster simply isn’t putting in the effort to make things happen.

Here are some tips to make AdSense work better for you. If you do them all and you are still not having any luck, then you just might be running one of those sites that don’t make money

1. Determine if your visitors are in the mood.

Like you mentioned at the top of this article, some web sites just don�t work with pay-per-click programs. For more details go to www.thegoogleincome.com .The best performing sites fall into one of these categories:

Sites where users go and expect to buy something while they are there. E-commerce sites fit the bill here.

Sites where users go to find specific information on something that they want to buy now. Music and video review sites, vacation information sites, resume building sites, etc. You don’t have to actually be selling these types of things; your site can just be a Mecca for information pertaining to these things. Then, when the visitor comes to read your content, they are more likely to click on your ads.

Sites where people who have disposable income and a credit card like to visit.

This includes sites with money management, investing and lifestyle content.

Sites that draw a large amount of new users every day. Free coupon sites and How to sites are good examples.

Sites where people go who expect to read ads. Classified ads and shopping comparison sites fit into this category.

2. Make sure that your visitors don’t feel that you just want to grab their money
Give them plenty of relevant and well-written content. If writing isn’t your best skill then hire someone to do it for you. Good content brings steady traffic and steady traffic pays the bills.

3. Play by the rules

Google has some very specific Terms of Service for participating in their AdSense program. Learn those rules and follow them so you don’t lose all of your investment by getting shut out.

4. Use the tools that Google gives you

Google gives you tools for determining the best keywords for your site, measuring ad performance, and setting up different ad channels for fine-tuning ad results. For more details visit to www.yourgoogleincome.com .These guys and girls are the 800 lb. Gorillas in the Pay-Per-Click market. They didn’t build these tools just to keep their programmers busy. Take advantage of their knowledge for they are very big and you are not!

5. Tweak, fine-tune and then tweak again

You should never be happy with your AdSense performance. If it’s good, then you need to make it great. If it’s great then you need to make it amazing. If it’s amazing then you need to take it to the UPS club.

The UPS club? Google sends all checks over $10,000 per month to the webmaster via UPS overnight delivery. Now there is a club that you wouldn’t mind belonging to.

6. Get more traffic

No matter how much traffic you have, you need more. More eyeballs translate to more clicks. Even if you are only pulling a 2% click-through. That’s a lot of clicks when you have thousands of visitors each day.

7. Experiment with new keywords

New keywords can bring new ads and new eyeballs along with it. Set up some new pages on your site and experiment with different content.

You can see results in near real time when you use Google’s AdWords. Don’t be afraid to be different. If something that everyone else is doing doesn’t work for you, then invent something that does work and get it on your site.

AMRITPAL CHEEMA
http://www.articlesbase.com/internet-marketing-articles/google-adsense-revenues-can-increase-through-some-techniques-683165.html

shoutfactoryhttp://gdata.youtube.com/feeds/api/users/shoutfactoryMoviesZach Galifianakis, Galifianakis, Stand Up Comedy, Purple Onion, Shout! Factory, Shout FactoryZach Galifianakis: Live At The Purple Onionhttp://gdata.youtube.com/feeds/api/videos/HemT_bmSKcI2009-10-23T19:35:16.000Z2010-03-28T04:00:30.000ZSyndication of this video was restricted by its owner.Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood (SUB) - 26 - Reunionwww.fullmetalalchemist.com Truths are exposed when Al finds the one called Father, and Mustang hears the tale of Bradleys creation but the most amazing revelation is reserved for Ed after he once again breaks alchemys greatest taboo.

Duration : 1:0:47

(more…)

Technorati Tags: Galifianakis, Purple Onion, Shout! Factory, Stand Up Comedy, Zach Galifianakis

I am planning to travel via Road from Dubai to Jeddah, and wanted to perform Umrah as well.
Question
1) I have car, but on lease. Can i Travel on that car?
2) If i have documents from Bank that i can travel do i have to take permission from RTA?
3) Do i need Car Insurance of Saudia Region?
4) How many hours drive is there from Dubai to Riyadh and Riyadh to Jeddah
5) Is there is only one route or more from Dubai to Riyadh
Thank u.. But any idea what documents are require, other than visa & passport at the Border while going to Saudia???

as i know
1- yes u can but, put u have to bring a permission from the bank to travel.
2- is your document to travil outside country then u can.
3-no no need to insurance and if it is needed then from the board.
4- from duabi to riyadh 8-10 hours according to speed. and also 8-9 hour from riyadh to jedah.
5- from emarit to riyadh there is 2 road but the nearest is thou alkarj. and riyadh to jeddah only one road.

A Pilgrimage is purposeful trip taken as a matter of faith or homage to a higher purpose, usually to a place of great significance.

A strategy is a plan to successfully reach a goal.

I have just resigned from my job in UAE so my resident visa will be cancelled in a few days. but I want to go for Umrah before returning to INDIA. Can any one guide me in this.

Yes, It is possible but after cancelling visa you go directly from dubai to Mecca & return it to India.

Probably not.

I have seen different groups of shia pilgrims doing different things during haj and visits.

Someone asked about Gold fake Gold or white Gold, we know any kind of Gold is Haram for men for it brings the invitation to the Jinn. Al hamdoullah
All other metals are fine but Gold to answer that question which I am sure the great brothers and sisters did. Its halal day, what did you do halal today? Anything?

@saada,
silk is haram for men,

She has power over them from her sexuality. She represents man’s baser desires/weaknesses.

i am planning to go Umrah with my family but i want to book my ticket (flight) online because it is cheaper than a travel agent so do i have to get it from the embassy in london or what??? please tell in full explanation also i heared you cant book your own tickets is that right?why?

Thank you!

You do need to book your trip through a travel agent acknowledged in KSA like i.e.
http://www.eonetravel.co.uk/umrah_final.html to obtain a visa. (you’ll find more looking online) The Saudi Embassy doesn’t issue Umrah Visas.

Why? Guess it’s called "organisation" and it’s just not the Embassy’s job to issue visas to go on Pilgrimage. They have to take care of other things also:))